"I sinned with an 18 year old girl......" | Laughter Time | EP-16


Man to his priest: “Yesterday I sinned with an 18 year old girl.”

The priest: “Squeeze 18 lemons and drink the juice all at once.”

Man: “And that frees me from my sin?”

Priest: “No, but it frees your face from that dirty grin.” 

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Doctor: “I’ve found a great new drug that can help you with your sleeping problem.”
 
Patient: “Great, how often do I have to take it?”
 
Doctor: “Every two hours.”

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I heard a report about a bad outbreak of the tummy bug, apparently 9 out of 10 people there suffered from diarrhea.

I can’t stop thinking about that tenth person who apparently enjoyed it.


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On a mountain trip a man falls down into a crack. His wife calls after him, “Are you OK?”
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“Yeah!”
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“Are you hurt?”
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“No!”
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“Not a scratch? How come?!“
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“I’m not done falling yet-et-et-et-et!”


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Policeman: I'm very sorry, sir, but it looks like your wife got hit by a bus.
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Man: I’m aware of that, but Karen has a wonderful personality.


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Teacher: How can we get some clean water?
Student: Bring the water from the river and wash it. 


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A guy says to his friend, "Guess how many coins I have in my pocket."
The friends says, "If I guess right, will you give me one of them?"
The first guys says, "If you guess right, I'll give you both of them!" 


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A: Meet my new born brother.
B: Oh, he is so handsome! What's his name?
A: I don't know. I can't understand a word he says.


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The First 3 Years of Marriage


  • In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens.
  • In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens.
  • In the third year, they both speak and the neighbors listen.


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This is a bilingual English/Spanish joke-- especially good for a class of native Spanish speakers. It also illustrates an important gramatical difference between languages (genders of nouns).
An Englishman went to Spain on a fishing trip. He hired a Spanish guide to help him find the best fishing spots. Since the Englishman was learning Spanish, he asked the guide to speak to him in Spanish and to correct any mistakes of usage. They were hiking on a mountain trail when a very large, purple and blue fly crossed their path. The Englishmen pointed at the insect with his fishing rod, and said, "Mira el mosca!" The guide, sensing a teaching opportunity, replied, "No, senor, 'la mosca'... es feminina."
The Englishman looked at him, then back at the fly, and then said, "Good heavens... you must have incredibly good eyesight."

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